My Dearest Adam,
This fateful journey that we are on through our connection has gone through the full spectrum; frightening, frustrating, shocking, exhausting, energizing, nostalgic, blissful, peaceful, impactful. We have seen each other go through self-transformation watching it play out for the other. However, most of our self-transformation has been done while we have limited contact with each other. The more negatives have been when we have fought accepting the connection, and the self-healing that was in resistance to love itself. The positives have been when we are accepting the connection, and the self-healing process, or when physically together. It is said that the eyes are the windows of the soul, and I have witnessed that first hand, as when I look into your eyes I see you first, and as I continue staring into your eyes, I begin to see my soul reflected to me like a mirror.
I have always loved looking at you. You are so handsome, I love the color of your eyes, the curves of your nose, the shape of your mouth. I would imagine kissing you, and you would touch your lips. Did you feel my intention to kiss you like you were kissed? I have imprinted your image in my minds eye, so it’s like I see you physically before me whenever I want to look at you. I believe that you have imprinted me into your minds eye as well. There was one time that we were together, and you squatted down right next to me and stared at me intently, like you were studying the curves of my face. I saw you staring at me in my peripheral, and thought I could turn to look at you, but decided to enjoy you taking me in as long as you wanted. It felt very intimate as you were visually taking me in. Another time, I was staring at you gazing into your eyes, I felt I was peering deeper into you, and you let me for a bit, but eventually you told me to stop staring at you. Adam, what did you see, or feel that you did not want to see, or feel, or was it what you did not want me to see, or feel? Trust me, I could not see anything within, or about you that I would not accept. I accept you for you within any moment, and all of you.
Early on, after we met, I watched you work yourself into what I can only call exhaustion, which is an understatement. You were barely able to stand and even seemed to sway in your stance. I remember walking up to you and asking you, “what the hell are you doing to yourself?!”. Did you think that I was unaware as to why you had done this? Adam, I know that our meeting in the manner we did, and my lack of availability was difficult for us both. First, I thought you only worked yourself almost literally into the ground because you could not stop thinking about me. However, I now realize that the only reason you fought thinking about me so much was because you felt as though I was not choosing a path to come together with you, so you did not want to think about me. Adam, you have always been my heart and soul’s choice, always will be. I knew of your existence all my life, and once I recognized you, you are my only home. It just took me longer to bring my physical life path onto my heart and soul life path with you as my one and only true companion.
Fast forward to many years later, and I had worked myself into exhaustion as well. I did it because I so wanted to build, and share a life with you, yet we had not brought ourselves into that capacity in each other’s life. Adam, I know how it feels to want to be with someone, and not feel that they choose you back. In fact, I remember you once telling me, “you are not right for you right now. How do you think you are going to attract the right man for you to you? You have to become right for you, and trust me, once you do, the right man for you will come.”. At that time, I wanted to argue with you, and probably did that I was. You were right, I wasn’t right for me, I was in a place of lack, of not enough in every facet of my life. I now am no longer in lack mentality, and understand that I am enough, am more than enough regardless of outward circumstances. Later, you walked up to me again, in sheer exhaustion. I asked you what was going on, and why you were so exhausted. You replied that you hadn’t been sleeping because you had too many thoughts, and things involving other people in your life. I said to you, “First off, nothing happens to you.”, I may have explained how everything is a choice, or a consequence of a choice. I added, “as far as the overthinking, just stop it! And other people can’t control you.”. You replied that “sometimes other people impact our lives”. I agreed, and knew you were referring to me impacting your life. Adam, I watched you surrender deeper to our connection right in front of me. You spoke out loud, “I can’t do this anymore!”. You then suddenly got really serious, and asked me, “Where’s my Heaven on Earth? I am ready for it.”. I was taken back by your sudden serious question, and replied, “it’s here for you, it’s there for you. Ask God for guidance, He will show you.”. Next, you got even more serious explaining to me the right way that you want to do things with the woman you will marry. I am sorry Adam, I freaked out in response. I asked you a lot of questions, you calmly answered every question with the same answer. Thank you for being so calm as I freaked out. You were seeing if I was ready to honor and cherish the sacredness that you want to share. I was not quite ready then. I had to come more fully into honoring the sacredness of our connection before I could honor your sacred, right way for forever. Adam, we both want the forever, and the sacred two that become one, and that is what we have. You are my forever, I only want to come together to honor being each other’s forever and the sacredness that exists between us.
Eternally Yours,
Eve
This fateful journey that we are on through our connection has gone through the full spectrum; frightening, frustrating, shocking, exhausting, energizing, nostalgic, blissful, peaceful, impactful. We have seen each other go through self-transformation watching it play out for the other. However, most of our self-transformation has been done while we have limited contact with each other. The more negatives have been when we have fought accepting the connection, and the self-healing that was in resistance to love itself. The positives have been when we are accepting the connection, and the self-healing process, or when physically together. It is said that the eyes are the windows of the soul, and I have witnessed that first hand, as when I look into your eyes I see you first, and as I continue staring into your eyes, I begin to see my soul reflected to me like a mirror.
I have always loved looking at you. You are so handsome, I love the color of your eyes, the curves of your nose, the shape of your mouth. I would imagine kissing you, and you would touch your lips. Did you feel my intention to kiss you like you were kissed? I have imprinted your image in my minds eye, so it’s like I see you physically before me whenever I want to look at you. I believe that you have imprinted me into your minds eye as well. There was one time that we were together, and you squatted down right next to me and stared at me intently, like you were studying the curves of my face. I saw you staring at me in my peripheral, and thought I could turn to look at you, but decided to enjoy you taking me in as long as you wanted. It felt very intimate as you were visually taking me in. Another time, I was staring at you gazing into your eyes, I felt I was peering deeper into you, and you let me for a bit, but eventually you told me to stop staring at you. Adam, what did you see, or feel that you did not want to see, or feel, or was it what you did not want me to see, or feel? Trust me, I could not see anything within, or about you that I would not accept. I accept you for you within any moment, and all of you.
Early on, after we met, I watched you work yourself into what I can only call exhaustion, which is an understatement. You were barely able to stand and even seemed to sway in your stance. I remember walking up to you and asking you, “what the hell are you doing to yourself?!”. Did you think that I was unaware as to why you had done this? Adam, I know that our meeting in the manner we did, and my lack of availability was difficult for us both. First, I thought you only worked yourself almost literally into the ground because you could not stop thinking about me. However, I now realize that the only reason you fought thinking about me so much was because you felt as though I was not choosing a path to come together with you, so you did not want to think about me. Adam, you have always been my heart and soul’s choice, always will be. I knew of your existence all my life, and once I recognized you, you are my only home. It just took me longer to bring my physical life path onto my heart and soul life path with you as my one and only true companion.
Fast forward to many years later, and I had worked myself into exhaustion as well. I did it because I so wanted to build, and share a life with you, yet we had not brought ourselves into that capacity in each other’s life. Adam, I know how it feels to want to be with someone, and not feel that they choose you back. In fact, I remember you once telling me, “you are not right for you right now. How do you think you are going to attract the right man for you to you? You have to become right for you, and trust me, once you do, the right man for you will come.”. At that time, I wanted to argue with you, and probably did that I was. You were right, I wasn’t right for me, I was in a place of lack, of not enough in every facet of my life. I now am no longer in lack mentality, and understand that I am enough, am more than enough regardless of outward circumstances. Later, you walked up to me again, in sheer exhaustion. I asked you what was going on, and why you were so exhausted. You replied that you hadn’t been sleeping because you had too many thoughts, and things involving other people in your life. I said to you, “First off, nothing happens to you.”, I may have explained how everything is a choice, or a consequence of a choice. I added, “as far as the overthinking, just stop it! And other people can’t control you.”. You replied that “sometimes other people impact our lives”. I agreed, and knew you were referring to me impacting your life. Adam, I watched you surrender deeper to our connection right in front of me. You spoke out loud, “I can’t do this anymore!”. You then suddenly got really serious, and asked me, “Where’s my Heaven on Earth? I am ready for it.”. I was taken back by your sudden serious question, and replied, “it’s here for you, it’s there for you. Ask God for guidance, He will show you.”. Next, you got even more serious explaining to me the right way that you want to do things with the woman you will marry. I am sorry Adam, I freaked out in response. I asked you a lot of questions, you calmly answered every question with the same answer. Thank you for being so calm as I freaked out. You were seeing if I was ready to honor and cherish the sacredness that you want to share. I was not quite ready then. I had to come more fully into honoring the sacredness of our connection before I could honor your sacred, right way for forever. Adam, we both want the forever, and the sacred two that become one, and that is what we have. You are my forever, I only want to come together to honor being each other’s forever and the sacredness that exists between us.
Eternally Yours,
Eve